Build friendships, not just business relations

The world today is getting more and more global. We are born in one place, maybe move somewhere else to grow up and go to school, work in yet another city, sometimes marry someone from another city or country, and possibly work in yet another country. In our lifetime, it would be very rare to say that we were born, grew up and still live in the same city.

Moving to a new culture is not unusual anymore. With constant people movement, we may never have moved from our hometown, yet we are surrounded by different ethnic groups, nationalities and cultures. How do both cultures strike a balance to meet somewhere in the middle? How do we create a win-win situation?

Many years ago, Singapore's former Prime Minister, Mr Lee Kuan Yew, had the foresight to forge good relations with China. Today, we celebrate Singapore's relationship with China in so many different sectors of society: political, economic, social, etc. A large majority of Singaporeans are ethnically Chinese. We still speak the language of our ancestors, and Mandarin, the working Chinese language of today. But, we are so different from China. Unless we learn, we cannot work well together.

In the above article, Mr Lee says that we Singaporean Chinese must live in China to be truly bicultural. I agree. The best way to learn about a people and its culture is to be fully immersed in the atmosphere. We will never really "be one of them", but we will be able to understand what makes them tick. That's where the real relationship or 关系 is formed.

Business relationships are temporal. Friendships are for life. Singapore and China have built a friendship. Let us, the people of Singapore and China, build personal friendships. It begins by learning the language.

我们都要学普通话！We must all learn Mandarin!

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Equipments or equipment?

Poor spelling, bad grammar, wrong use of plural form, typos, ... the list can go on and on. I worked in Corporate Communications for too long. I had a perfectionist boss for way too long. I tend to pick out mistakes faster than I can appreciate the content of a written piece. Sigh. Will this occupational hazard ever go away?

Now I'm going to be a corporate trainer, facilitating seminars on customer service. Granted most customer service is oral, rather than written, but really, what's the difference? A frontline staff who can't express himself properly to be understood is just as bad as a poorly written letter. Bottom line: your company's brand and image has been tarnished for a long time, if not for life.

Once in a blue moon, typos make for a more interesting meaning, but it still mars your professional image. What's in a brand name anyway? A lot. First impressions can either make or break your professional image.

Many years ago, my friend complained about her boss. He drafted letters that she had to type, get him to sign, then mail out. Problem was the boss didn't quite know proper English. "Equipments" showed up quite often in his drafts because the company sold musical instruments and related equipment. Since "equipment" is both singular and plural, she typed up the draft without the "s" after "equipment" and promptly got a scolding from the boss himself.

"Hah? You think you so clever ah? You don't change my English ok? "Equipments" not "equipment". You just type what I write. Don't try to be smarter than me!" So, she got told off way too many times, not to correct his perfect English!

What do you do with a boss like that? Of course, she eventually found another job!

No matter what your level of English may be (or any other language, for that matter), let's do our best to learn it well, so as not to embarrass ourselves. It's perfectly alright to make mistakes, but let's learn from them and move on.

Have fun learning English!

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ARAISE or ARISE?

My friend is visiting Sri Lanka and took this photo. So apt because the hotel where the conference is being held was destroyed by the December 2004 tsunami. Now, it's back up and fully operational.

Sometime ago, I wrote about typo errors that actually add to the meaning of the text, rather than stand out as a glaring mistake. This is another of those typo errors that make the English language so rich and meaningful.

Of course, if you're a purist, you will be most upset because the conference organisers have seemingly mangled the English language. I'm almost a purist, having taught business English in non-English speaking countries, and spent many years in Corporate Communications. Bad grammar and poor spelling irk me. They do! It reflects badly on you and the company you represent. Poor spelling and bad grammar must be corrected before the document goes out. I'm all for that.

But, once in a while, I do like the little typo here and there because it adds so much colour to life.

So, let's push for good English, but let's also appreciate the typos that mean so much to the context. Let's ARAISE - raise up a destroyed dream, and rise to the occasion!

Happy learning English! Fun Language Tools

Do you love books?

Do you love books? I do! Ever since I was a child, my mother introduced me to books. We took a trip to the library every week and spent hours and hours browsing, then borrowing as many books as were allowed at one time.

I learned to read English as soon as I could make out the letters. My dad taught me how to hold a pencil correctly and write my "abc". Till this day, I love reading, but I must say I still prefer holding an actual book, rather than reading off a screen. Somehow, my brain takes in more from a printed page, rather than an electronic screen.

This article talks about buying books for children. I love it! Children are sponges. Introduce them to anything and they absorb it quickly. I had many gifts of books while growing up. I loved buying story books every year at the school book sale. Books about different cultures and peoples of the world fascinated me the most. Perhaps this is one of the reasons why I'm so into multi-cultural and cross-cultural books and ideas.

Learning languages came much later. I grew up in a monolingual home. My first language is English, even though I'm ethnically Chinese. Today, I can speak Mandarin and several other languages in varying levels of fluency. It is sheer hard work, but a thoroughly enjoyable experience. I haven't stopped learning yet.

So, this Christmas, if you're going to buy a gift(s), why not choose a book? Give the gift of learning today!

Happy shopping!

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What's your favourite food?

I always thought that our favourite food would be the food of our nation or culture i.e. what I've grown up eating would be what I enjoy most. Many of my American friends will eat nothing other than steak and potatoes. Fish comes in the form of fish fingers or filets, not whole fish with eyes staring at you from the plate. (Sound funny? I do have a big Puerto Rican friend who couldn't sit at the table while we were enjoying the delicious whole steamed fish! He kept shielding his eyes from the fish. We had to hurry up and finish the fish, and get the waiter to remove the plate immediately!)

So, I decided to take a poll on Facebook. I posted on my wall asking what your favourite kind of food is (e.g. Chinese, Italian, Thai, etc) without having to give a reason. Do I really need to justify my choice of a favourite food???

Out of the few responses I got, the majority of them said "Chinese". This really surprised me. I had non-Chinese friends saying they loved Chinese food. As expected, a few friends said their favourite food was from whatever culture they are from (e.g. Thai, Filipino, Mexican, etc). But I still can't figure out why a non-Chinese would say Chinese food is best.

Then again, there is really no need to have a reason for liking a particular kind of food. Tastebuds are subjective. To each his own. One of my friends was cheeky enough to ask if "free food" counted as favourite! Haha. I don't see why not!

So, are our tastebuds nationalistic? I don't know. While we're enriching our lives and knowledge with other cultures and languages, let's enrich our tastebuds too with delicious food from around the world!

Enjoy your feast!

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Fried spiders anyone?

I've always been an adventurous eater, thanks to my dad. My dad used to love to try new kinds of food and new eating places. I learned to enjoy raw fish (both Japanese and Cantonese style), eat snails (French escargot and Asian stir-fried snails), and learn to appreciate so many different kinds of weird and delicious food eaten around the world. My philosophy of food is: "I'll try anything once. If I don't like it, at least I can say that I've tried it and don't like it."

Because of my adventurous tastebuds, I get irked by people who say, "Ewwwww! How can you eat that?!" or "There is NO WAY I am going to try that! That's gross!" (Note: these expressions are accompanied with a look of great disgust.) If I mentioned what nationality those people are, I'd be beaten to a pulp physically and verbally. Some readers will know who those folks are. Better left unsaid.

When I moved to Cambodia as a missionary teacher, I ate everything put in front of me, with very few exceptions. I enjoyed everything. I ate like a local. My local colleagues and students loved me because I would eat anything they offered and enjoy it e.g. fried spiders (picture above). This was a real treat because the good ones are only available on the way to the countryside. So, if I or someone else was passing that way, we'd be sure to buy some for the office staff as a treat.

Some years ago, The 700 Club sent a Filipino cameraman, John, and white American producer, Ken, to Cambodia to film the CBN medical team in action. The team travelled daily to different villages to treat patients. On the last day of the filming, Ken needed to film a story on fried spiders. So, we headed to the truck stop of Skoun (1.5hr drive from the city) to get the story.

Ken was petrified as we approached Skoun. This big white man cowered in fear at the trays of fried spiders. Since he had a hard time getting people who were willing to be interviewed on camera, I got on camera as well. Ken bravely did his few lines eating a spider leg, then spit it out as fast as he could as soon as John said, "Cut." The children watching giggled at this big white man and his antics. They got to eat the leftover spider that Ken couldn't stomach. We spent about 1/2 day filming the story and headed back to the city.

For the rest of the evening, we couldn't stop laughing at Ken. John had to do his best to keep the camera from shaking because he was trying to stifle his laughter. Even over dinner at a fancy French restaurant, we were laughing over every bite of our meal. For Ken, he had heard about fried spiders from someone else. He sold the story so convincingly to his boss that he had no choice but to return to the US with the footage.

Nothing really prepares you for the experience, does it? You may be like Ken - terrified of the dead insects that we eat as a snack. Or, you may not be scared, but disgusted instead. Or, be like me and jump right in to see if you like the taste. Whichever type of person you are, try something new today. Be adventurous! You'll be richer for the experience.

Happy eating adventures!

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Cook a Pot of Curry Day

Food is just so close to our hearts. No wonder the old saying goes, "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach." Honestly, this saying applies to both men and women, not exclusively to men.

A rumoured incident in Singapore created a hot and spicy ripple of reaction across this tiny island country. When the tempers calmed, we found out that the incident actually happened several years ago, and not recently, as the whole incident seemed to imply. Well, since we all found out the truth before the said Cook a Pot of Curry Day, everybody decided to carry on and cook curry anyway. After all, food is just so close to our hearts. Besides, Singaporeans pride themselves on their love of good food.

What ended up happening was a pleasant and happy outcome. Ordinary families cooked their favourite kind of curry and invited friends and neighbours to come over for a meal. It became a pot-luck curry lunch/dinner among friends and family. It also became an informal multi-cultural event. Families and friends of different races shared their special type of curry with one another.

I didn't take part, but I thought it was a very happy ending to what could have been a very nasty incident. New immigrants need to learn to adapt and fit into our neighbourhood, not the other way around. What better introduction than over food - something close to everybody's heart.

Here's to adventurous eating and learning about another culture in the process!

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