Culture change begins with me

More stories on Asian nosiness. Or at least what the non-Asian perceives as nosiness.

I first visited Cambodia in 1994, then stayed a year to work there, beginning 1995. This was how we introduced ourselves to each other:

Khmer: (Hands clasped in front of you as though in prayer) Hello.
Foreigner: (Respond with same hand gesture) Hello.
Khmer: Where are you from?
Foreigner: I'm from America (or whatever country you come from).
Khmer: How old are you?
Foreigner: Old enough (said with a big smile)
Khmer: Are you married?
Foreigner: Yes (or No)
Khmer: How much is your salary?
Foreigner: Not much, but compared to your country, a lot. Remember, things are very expensive in my country.

Notice that the Khmer person never asked for a name. You see, in Khmer culture, names are not important. Age, marital status and salary are public information. To the western person, age and salary are classified or restricted or private information! But, the Khmer has no ill-intent. They want to know how old you are, so that they can address you by the correct term: older sibling, uncle, aunt, grandmother, grandfather, teacher, etc. It is not polite to call someone by name. The correct title must be used.

Thankfully, times have changed in Phnom Penh, Cambodia. By the time we entered the year 2000 and beyond, anyone under age 25 years would introduce themselves the western way, by saying his name first. Age is still somewhat public information, but not salary. Young people said they hate it when their older relatives tell everyone how much they earn. If you earn a lot, telling everyone is to show off. If you earn a little, it's too embarrassing to tell others. The young don't like it.

So, does culture change over time? Yes. It begins with a group of people who refuse to follow the trend, but set a new trend instead. What good trend do I want to set for my culture?

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