The eyes say it all

Monday morning rush hour. The train is packed. I'm in the train already, close to the door. A guy runs in before the door closes. I saw him on the bus earlier. Sharp, handsome, not very tall. He looks Pinoy (Filipino).

Three stops later, I position myself to get off the still-crowded train. He turned his head and looked at me. I nodded.

When the train stopped and the doors opened, he stepped off the train and stood to one side so that I, and others behind me, could get off.

What just happened?

The eyes said it all.

He looked at me with eyes that said, "Are you getting off?" I nodded to say, "Yes."

Pinoys communicate with their facial expressions, not so much the rest of their body. So, technically, I can't call it body language, rather facial language. Observe Filipinos talking to each other. Yes, they talk a lot! (No offence here. I love Filipinos and have lots of good Filipino friends!) Very often, they use their eyes to say something, raise their eyebrows to say "yes", or purse their lips in a direction to point to something. (No, they're not offering to kiss you.) It is quite easy to read their facial language. I find it a very effective way to communicate. Words not required.

Some nationalities talk with their hands. I do. Filipinos talk with their faces.

Body language surpasses the need to know another's language in order to communicate. Then again, body language is a language in itself!

Have fun learning to communicate cross-culturally!

Body language - our daily communication tool

Is body language considered a proper language? Not officially, I suppose, but we all "speak" it without even realising that we are sending a message!

Here's an example of how body language worked effectively.

"Remember, we speak with our voices but communicate with our bodies. You have just seven seconds to make a positive first impression." - Dr Seow Bee Leng, "More than you can say" (CATS Recruit, 13 Aug 2013)

What message are we communicating today? Let it be positive!

Fun Language Tools

Invite me or force me?

If you invite me to do something, do I have a choice to say 'yes' or 'no'? If the question is in English, the answer would be a definite "Yes, you have a choice". After all, you didn't say that I had to do it. I can always choose to say "no" if I don't feel like it or it is not convenient.

However, I have discovered this may not be true in other languages. I found that in two Asian languages (Khmer and Indonesian), when you say you are inviting someone to do something, it is simply being polite. In some instances, the thing you are invited to do is compulsory. Huh? I have reacted in one of two ways: frustration or laughter.

Let me give you examples of what I mean:
I was on a bus going from Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam, to Phnom Penh, Cambodia. The bus company is a Cambodian one, so the bus attendant gave instructions in both Khmer and English. As we approached the border crossing, the Attendant stood in front of the bus to give us passengers instructions when crossing the border. He was polite in saying in English: "When the bus stops at the border, you are invited to get off the bus and get your passport stamped at the checkpoint..." He repeated the same instructions in Khmer. Since I understand both English and Khmer, I knew that the English was simply a literal translation of the Khmer. Since I was sitting in the front row, I had to do all that I could to stop myself from bursting out laughing!

Why? Every passenger has to get off the bus to get his passport stamped at the border crossing. We have no choice! I was relating the story to my Filipino friends living in Phnom Penh, and they promptly burst out laughing when I got to "you are invited to get off the bus". If we don't have a choice in the matter, don't "invite" us, tell us politely!

Example 2: Each month, I receive an email and a phone text message informing me of the monthly meeting I must attend. The opening line always reads: "You are invited to the monthly Workers' Prayer Meeting ..." At the end of the email and the text message, this line appears: "Attendance is compulsory." When I first started receiving these messages, I was flabbergasted! As in the example above, my reaction was, "What do you mean 'invite' me then tell me that I have to go?!" The next reaction became frustration. The ones who crafted the messages are Indonesians who have varying levels of English proficiency. My Indonesian friend laughed at me. She explained that the use of the word "invite" in Indonesian denotes politeness. Yes, well, if used in English, it takes on an entirely different connotation! My last retort was that they need to study English all over again.

What's the problem here? We simply speak the foreign language in exactly the same way we would our native language. We literally translate the sentence in our heads, then speak it out, thinking it is correct. Wrong move! No two languages are exactly alike. We need to learn a language well enough to speak it the way it should be spoken. No word for word translations. Misunderstanding results when we think we know what we are saying but have actually unintentionally communicated the wrong message.

So what should the instructions or email/text message read in English?

When we arrive at the border crossing, please get off the bus and have your passport stamped by the Immigration Officer before boarding the bus again.

Kindly note that the monthly Workers' Prayer Meeting will be held as follows: (date, time, venue). Please note that attendance is compulsory.

At the end of the day, we're not all perfect. Learning is lifelong. Let's learn to laugh at ourselves and enjoy the learning journey! We'll get there someday.

Have fun learning a language!

Fun Language Tools

Be kind today

Kindness is a universal language

A smile. An act of kindness. A touch. These are universal and always welcome. No common spoken language of communication is needed. We all understand a friendly face.

While we set out to learn a new language, let us not forget that body language speaks so much louder than words ever can. So, give your best smile today! Go make someone happy!

Fun Language Tools

Singapore - efficient in every way!

Foreigners who come to Singapore often complain that they don't understand what Singaporeans are saying. Sometimes it is not our accent but the words. We're efficient! Everything must be "chop! chop! Let's go!" So who said communication is all about words?

Fun Language Tools doesn't offer material to learn Singlish, but you can find many other languages available here: Chinese, Japanese, Thai, Greek, Hebrew, Spanish, French, Italian, etc, etc.

Learn a new language, open up a new world of opportunities!

Fun Language Tools

Speak their language, don't understand them

I speak their language, but I don't understand what they are saying.

My friend has said this to me several times over the years. He has lived in his adopted country for more than 10 years, has a local wife and a son who attends a local school. He should be an expert in the local culture and language by now. But why did he say this? Why aren't the locals getting through to him? Where has the communication failed?

Communication is more than just words. We all know that. Ho hum. Learning a language does not equal being able to communicate. All it enables us to do is be able to "get by" in the new language. We can say what we need to say, but do they really get what we mean? Sometimes yes, oftentimes, no.

It takes many years, some say a lifetime, to fully understand and get into the psyche of a people and their culture. It does help if you are not so far removed from that culture e.g. a Chinese Singaporean person who works in Hong Kong. Yes, ethnically they are the same - Chinese. Yet, they are vastly different. Even if they are from the same language group i.e. Cantonese, Singaporeans and Hong Kongers are vastly different. Even the use of words is laced with nuances that another cannot understand. How much more this difference is magnified when you get a Westerner who lives and works in Asia! He may speak the local language fluently, but he will still complain like my friend did - just can't understand what goes on in their heads.

Can we just try to see something from their perspective? It isn't easy. But it isn't impossible either. It takes a lot of humility to say "I am a student". I have chosen to be a student of other cultures, not claiming to know it all. My eyes and horizon have widened and been greatly enriched because of this. The Chinese have a saying, 活到老，学到老. In English, it means, "live till an old age, learn till an old age". Perhaps a better translation would be "learning is lifelong".

Will you continue learning a new language and culture till the day you die? I will try. I want to keep learning something new every day! Find a tool here to help you.

Have fun learning!

Fun Language Tools

Short, to the point, but sweet?

Singaporeans are known to be efficient in all that they do. Everything in the country is supposed to work like clockwork, never breaking down. Well, almost. In our quest for speed and efficiency, our communication gets that way too. We are "to the point", without beating around the bush, even in sensitive areas.

It's possible that we got this from the Americans. Singapore is a mix of both east and west, but more west than east. We function in English more than any other Asian language. I was pleasantly surprised when I read this post on American Business English.

Communication is a two-way street. The sender has a certain message he wants to convey. The reader may perceive a different meaning. In brief communication, the tone may sound completely rude, simply because the message is so "to the point". But, remove that thought and step back one step. All we're trying to do is get the message across quickly. Personally, I like that. Going round in circles drives me nuts. Just tell it to me straight. I won't be offended.

Can that happen in Asia? Maybe in the next generation. In the meantime, we have to be students of the culture we're working with, which may not necessarily be our own. Or we can take a Business English course from +Mohalam Gonoux.

Happy learning!

Fun Language Tools

Talk with your hands, not with your mouth

Language is all about communication. Language may not always take the form of oral communication, but we do find that we talk faster than we can read. So, can your hands move faster than you can talk?

Deaf and hearing-impaired people are a special breed. They talk with their hands, often accompanied by facial expressions. They can't hear, but they are very expressive when they communicate. It is quite fun to watch them "talking" to each other, but I stop myself quickly because I'm eavesdropping, even though I don't understand a word!

There are many kinds of Sign Language: American, British, etc. I was told by a deaf person that the deaf don't have a problem understand another form of Sign Language. It's the hearing who get confused! Somehow the deaf can understand each other across the "language divide" quite well.

Why not learn Sign Language today? It will open up a whole new world and culture. You can also help the hearing-impaired with their studies in school. Learn something and bless someone with your new-found skills!

Happy Signing from Fun Language Tools!

"Help! I don't know that word!"

A white couple were practising their Khmer while shopping for needed household items at the Toul Tem Poung (or popularly known as "Russian") Market.  The shop lady was very kind and friendly, speaking slowly and clearly to make sure her potential customers could understand her.  

The couple got as far as telling the shop lady they needed a "rack".  The smiling shop lady then asked, "What kind of rack do you need?  Is it for shoes or plates?"  Suddenly, the white lady and her husband looked at each other blankly.  The shop lady repeated the question 2 more times, still patient and smiling.  The couple was dumbfounded!  Apparently, their limited vocabulary didn't include the words "shoes" and "plates".

I had to pass them to get where I was going.  I decided to be a kind soul and help them out.  I repeated the shop lady's question in English for the white couple, as I walked past them.  Suddenly, both their faces lit up in bright smiles!  "Thank you!" the husband said to me. 

 I didn't stay to find out if the sale was completed, but what a difference vocabulary makes when learning a language!  Communication isn't complete until both sides have understood each other.  It's hard work, whether we use a spoken language or body language.  But when we understand what the other is trying to say, a whole world opens up before us.

Have fun!

How it all began

"Now the whole earth had one language and one speech." (Genesis 11:1)

Wouldn't that be so nice?  We would never have a communication problem!  But man decided to "make a name" for themselves, which was not what God wanted.  "So the Lord scattered them abroad from there over the face of all the earth, and they ceased building the city.  Therefore its name is called Babel, because there the Lord confused the language of all the earth; and from there, the Lord scattered them abroad over the face of all the earth." (Genesis 11:8-9)

That is how we ended up not being able to communicate across cultures and nations.

The good news is that God understands us, whatever language we speak!  

But, I've learned a language or two in the last few years.  It's been fun, sometimes embarrassing, but it's opened up windows to the world that I would never have seen if I never embarked on this journey.