Happy = Merry

Since we are still within the 12 days of Christmas, here is another post about the holiday.

So many of my Cambodian friends like to wish people "Happy, Merry Christmas!" A double wish does not add more happiness to the season. What do I mean? "Happy" and "merry" have exactly the same meaning. Traditionally, we wish friends and acquaintances "Merry Christmas". Once in a while, we may say, "Happy Christmas!" Whichever one you choose to use is correct, just not the two words together.

Having said all that, no one ever says, "Merry Birthday!"

Merry? Marry?

Spelling errors again!

After so many years of teaching basic English to non-native speakers, my students (and their friends and students) still make the same mistake. Instead of

Merry Christmas

they write

Marry Christmas

Of course spellcheck, auto-correct and predictive text do not fix the error, simply because "Marry" is a proper English word. It just does not belong with Christmas! Unless of course you are getting married to the holiday, then maybe ...

As I have told my students numerous times (to absolutely no effect!), check, check and re-check every piece of work before you send it out. One small spelling error and your reputation is tarnished.

So unless you have decided to get married to Christmas (which is quite impossible), please wish your friends and family a

Merry Christmas!

Ants? Aunts?

Did you spot the error?

Always check, check and re-check before your text goes to final print!

God blesses you

I wished a friend "Happy Birthday", to which he replied, "Thank you ... God blesses you".

This set me thinking about how we generally end a conversation or give a parting greeting other than "goodbye".

While the standard phrase used across the world is "God bless you", what my friend said (God blesses you) is not wrong, just not used.

When I say "God bless you" to someone, I am wishing him blessings from God above. I want him to enjoy life and all that God has for him. Of course, the complete and correct form of the greeting should be "May God bless you". People, being the lazy or efficient people that we are, have conveniently dropped the "may", but the intention and the good wishes remain intact.

"God blesses you", on the other hand, is in a different tense altogether. What my friend is trying to tell me is that God does bless me. (He does too!) His intention is to ask God to bless me, but what has emerged is a fact: that God blesses me. Either way, I receive the blessing.

Non-native speakers of English sometimes have funny ways of expressing themselves. What they say can be hilarious, yet sometimes so poetic. In this case, what my friend has said is true, and I would wish that on anyone I meet, simply because God does bless and wants to bless people!

So, may God bless you and God blesses you today!

Have fun with languages!

Do you sell "seever"?

At a baking goods store:

Young Chinese man: Do you sell "seever"?
Cashier: What is that?
Young Chinese man: To sieve.
Cashier: It's outside, over there (pointing in the direction of the shelf outside the store).
Me: Sieve, not "seever".

Young man and his mother proceed out of the store to the said shelf, out of earshot.

Cashier: This one isn't so bad. Sometimes the customer says something we don't understand and get scolded in the process. Indians are the worst! We don't understand what they say and ask politely for them to repeat.
Me: Sometimes their intonation ...
Cashier: Indian accent! So difficult to understand! And they won't admit it!
Living in a multi-racial and multi--cultural society has its joys and pains, more joys than pains. Varied accents and interpretations of English words can be a source of laughter or anger, jokes or misunderstandings. Sometimes we just have to think a little convoluted to figure out what the other person is trying to say (and hopefully not embarrass him while doing so).

Language is fun and essential to human communication. Communicate to be understood across cultures. Do try to use the correct word(s) and grammar. Most importantly, have fun in the process!

Happy language learning!

"Can't pay" = A toast!

Two tourists from the west were visiting China. They were having dinner at a Chinese restaurant where a wedding banquet was taking place in the same hall.

In keeping with Chinese tradition, the newlyweds were going from table to table to toast their guests. At each table, everyone would stand up, raise their glasses to the happy couple, and everyone would say, "干杯！" (pronounced "gan bei")

The western tourists were watching with curiosity as they knew no Mandarin. As the toasting continued, they began to get rather agitated.

As the couple finished toasting the last table of guests, the tourists went up to the couple and said, "If you can't pay, let us know. We will pay the bill for you!"

干杯 (gan bei) in Mandarin literally means "empty glass" or "bottoms up" in English. Since these tourists knew no Mandarin, they thought the newlyweds were telling each table of guests "can't pay!" Both phrases sound similar.

To those who know Mandarin, this story is a classic case of miscommunication. Similar sounding words and phrases in different languages can have vastly different meanings. The moral of the story is: do not assume anything. Ask for clarification.

Happy cross-cultural communication!

All languages, same root

Have you ever wondered where language came from and why some languages are so similar? Well, here's a very good explanation.

Well, this is my simple explanation. The origins of all language today came from the Creator God.

After all, we humans all originated from the family of Noah in the Bible!

Be nice to one another. We are a family after all!

English grammar Russian style

Toxic grammar, need an anti-oxidant

What is this sentence trying to say? I have no idea.

This is a delivery van for a company that sells fresh fruit. Should the sentence be a question or a statement? Grammatically, it is so wrong. Contextually, it makes no sense. How should it read?

My suggestion:

Have you had fruits yet?

Many kinds of fresh fruit are known as anti-oxidants. We eat them to get rid of the toxins accumulated in our bodies from all the other kinds of foods that we eat. I think this company's copywriter needs some anti-oxidants for his English skills, to get rid of all the toxins in his English grammar.

Please do not butcher the English language. Use it correctly.

Happy writing!

Cryptic sign, but we all understand!

I spotted this sign at the supermarket. I have walked by many times but never paid attention to what it said, until that day. What language is this? Even SMS language does not have such abbreviations. Must be a unique combination of Singlish (aka "Singapore English) and fast typing.

The amazing thing is, we all understand the meaning. Wait a bit. The sales person will be back shortly to help you.

Happy shopping!

The fish lost his job

I was having a drink at a local food centre when I chanced on this dish called "Fired Fish".

The human brain is wired such that any normal person would have automatically read it as "Fried Fish". Unfortunately, I am not "any normal person". Years of proofreading work have caused me to pick up typo errors with alarming frequency. As I taught my Office Skills students, always ask someone else who has better language skills than you to check your work before you submit it. The person you choose must be detailed and meticulous, or your work will not be error-free. This picture is a good example.

In case you are wondering, I conclude that the fish lost his job (aka "got fired") through no fault of his own. Poor fish!

Happy eating!

Do you scare cockroach?

When I saw this question, I had a good laugh. The vast majority of humans are scared of cockroaches. I am not one of the majority. I get mad when I see a cockroach. My first reaction is, "How dare you invade my clean house?!" Then, I remove my slipper and whack it till it is dead. (A Hawaiian trait that I picked up after living there for three years.) I do not like cockroaches, but I am certainly not scared of them.

I have never seen a cockroach scared of humans before! The former English teacher in me proceeded to quickly correct the question. It should be:

Are you scared of cockroaches?

As I reflected on languages and translations, it dawned on me that the person asking the question was simply asking a question that is literally translated from an Asian language. In Chinese, the question would be, "你怕蟑螂吗？" (Literally "you scare(d) cockroach?) In the Indonesian and Cambodian languages, the English equivalent is exactly the same: "you scare(d) cockroach?" To make the question sound proper in English, you add "do" at the beginning. Hence,

Do you scare cockroach?

Of course, to the western mind, this would be ludicrous! If cockroaches were afraid of humans, they would not invade our homes and choose to make their home in ours.

Learning languages is fun. Learn to laugh at yourself. You will not forget the lesson.

Here's to exterminating cockroaches!

SMART phone or smartphone?

True story:

Me: Do you have a smartphone?
M: No, only Globe.
(Pause)
Ah! (lightbulb moment)
Hahaha. Yes, I have a smartphone.
(Still laughing)

Maybe only Filipinos will understand this joke, but with a bit of explanation, you will appreciate the simplicity of these few lines.

In the Philippines, the two biggest mobile phone service providers are SMART and Globe. Most Filipinos own two phones, one SMART and one Globe. Why? Use SMART to call friends who only have SMART service, and use Globe to call those on Globe. If calling a landline, use the phone that charges the least for calls to a landline. Then of course, there is always the issue of signal strength. Sometimes, you just have to use the phone that has a stronger signal in a certain area.

I was trying to find out from M if he had a smartphone so that we could text message for free using a chat app.

M does have a smartphone. We can chat for free while we are in our respective home countries.

Thank you, technology, for making our communication so simple.

Happy chatting across the world!

Please re-sting my tennis racket

I noticed this sign only after walking past it numerous times. Suddenly, it caught my attention. Of course, the grammar is wrong, but that is just minor compared with what they are advertising.

First, "sting" refers to an insect attack like that of a bee or hornet.

Second, a bee sting only happens once because the bee loses its ability to sting after one attempt. Therefore, there cannot be a "re-sting".

Third, tennis rackets cannot be stung. They are inanimate objects. They cannot feel pain.

A tennis racket, however, does need to get a new set of strings every so often when it is used frequently. This process is called "restringing". This is what the shop specialises in: restringing tennis rackets. Unfortunately, either the owner cannot spell or did not notice the typo error - for many years!

A minor error can mar a company's reputation for life. Let us check and re-check before it becomes "cast in stone".

Happy proof-reading!

An emoji speaks a thousand words

Congestion in the train (aka subway, metro) during the morning rush hours is a real problem in any big city in the world. Singapore is no different.

To help commuters in a hurry know how long they will have to wait to board the train or if there are any breakdowns on any of the lines, SMRT put up signs in every station to show this (pictured on the left).

The first signs had words only. Beside the name of each line (e.g. Circle Line), the word "normal" would show that the train service was running on normal schedule. However, some commuters cannot read English. To make the signs quickly recognisable, in came "emoji". Beside the word "normal" is a smiley face. Anyone in a hurry will catch this picture more quickly than words can.

If I can board the train quickly, I would be smiling too!

Emoji will be around for awhile yet.

:)

Do you speak Emoji?

A lament among older people is that young people today cannot string together a complete sentence. When asked a question, the young person will reply in a series of grunts and groans, peppered with a few words here and there. No wonder companies still invest heavily in public speaking skills for employees.

Let us now look at the written word. The majority of our communication today is by SMS or short messaging service. Whether you use a messaging app(lication) or conventional SMS, each piece of communication is probably going to be around 140 characters or less (Tweets included). It is bad enough that text language is a whole new field of learning, now we add Emoji, which is defined as:

a small digital image or icon used to express an idea or emotion in electronic communication.

Contrary to popular belief, Emoji-speak is not the domain of the younger crowd. The people who send me emoticons and stickers are generally over 50 years old! While I do use some icons, I have yet to discover the whole lot of pictures and their meanings. I suppose there are so many puzzled people like me in the world. Hence this online Emoji dictionary!

Has Emoji-speak become a new language? I do not know, neither do I want to speculate.

A picture is worth a thousand words

Emoji could well be the epitome of this idiom! :)

Only interesting people need apply

I hope to gathering this group of people soon and it will be open for whom are interesting!

What is wrong with this sentence? A lot. So, for those whose English is less than perfect, I will first dissect the sentence and correct the mistakes.

Original: "I hope to gathering this group of people soon"
Correct: "I hope to gather this group of people soon"
The correct form of the verb is "to gather". "Gathering" is the continuous tense of the verb (in this context) or could be a noun meaning a get-together e.g. "a gathering of this group of people".

Original: "and it will be open for whom are interesting!
Correct: "and it will be open to those who are interested!"
"Interesting" describes a person (in this context) who is fun to be around or is unusual in some way or another. "Interested" describes the person who is connected to the group's purpose or topic of discussion in some way or another.

"Open for" is generally used in a shop or business e.g. "we are open for business". When talking about a person or a specific proposal in the future, we use "open to".

"Whom" and "who" can be very confusing for the non-English user. I will not try to explain. Suffice it to say that this sentence will be correct with "those who" rather than "for whom".

What made me laugh about this sentence was the entire meaning at face value. This group is only open to those people who are fun to be around and/or are unique or unusual in some way! In other words, if you are a boring person, we do not want you. Knowing the writer of the sentence, this is far from the truth! The group is open to any woman who is interested in learning from other women and making new friends.

So, if you are not proficient in writing English, be careful what you write. It may backfire on you, while leaving you bewildered as to why. Consult a grammar book or a friend before you unleash your creativity in words.

Happy writing!

Less jargon, less paper used

The Singapore government is continuing its efforts to write simply so that the average person can understand "the fine print", otherwise known as Terms and Conditions. To be honest, how many of us actually read every word of the T&Cs before we agree? I certainly do not.

Therein lies the root of all legal disputes. We sign our lives away without realising what we are resigning ourselves to.

To communicate better with the general public and to reduce the number of disputes by frustrated customers, this new government initiative is bringing more benefits than expected. People now understand the new government policies, while government agencies and all other companies that produce contracts (e.g. banks, insurance companies) have reduced the amount of paper needed to print the documents. Win-win situation all around!

Communication is all about getting the message understood. Simplifying the language is one step towards that goal.

Maybe more people will start writing, rather than lament that writing is so difficult.

Give it a try! Write simply!

Play on words = great headline

The recent scandal over an American-owned meat supplier in China has once again opened up a can of worms over food safety in China.

What amused me most about this saga has nothing to do with food. The headline in the newspaper article caught my attention and sent me into peals of laughter. What a lovely play of words! Kebabs are pieces of meat on a skewer and put over a barbeque pit to cook. Barbeque restaurants in China are a common sight. So why not the pun?

Well done, The Straits Times sub-editors!

Can you speak your national language?

What is the national language of Singapore?
Do you not all use English on a daily basis?
You mean there is a national language in Singapore?

The answer to the above questions is: Malay is the national language of Singapore, but English is generally the language of everyday business and communication.

Singapore is a multi-ethnic, multicultural nation. The first inhabitants of this island were Malays. All others were foreigners looking for work and finally became immigrants, then citizens. Malay is the national language in honour of those who lived here first.

Every morning of the school year, every school-going child will sing the National Anthem, Majulah Singapura, which is written in the national language. Ask the average school-going child whether he knows what he is singing, and the answer is most likely to be "no". The average non-Malay adult will give you the same answer. Many cannot even pronounce the words correctly, much less understand the meaning of the song.

It seems to me that in every country of the world, natural born citizens are conversant in their national language. Why is it different in Singapore? I have no answer. However, I am supportive of Prof Kishore Mahbubani's suggestion (article pictured above) that all Singaporeans be able to carry on a simple conversation in Malay. At the very least, know what we are singing every morning in school and on official occasions. I imagine Singaporeans would be embarrassed if they were ever asked what the National Anthem means.

Let us learn something new today. Learn how to pronounce the words of the National Anthem correctly. Learn the meaning of what we are singing. Be proud to be Singaporean!

I am!

35 years of Speak Mandarin Campaign

2014 marks 35 years of the Speak Mandarin Campaign in Singapore. Quite an achievement for a country that turns 49 years old in August 2014.

Singapore began life as a trading port made up of Malay natives (who spoke only Malay) and immigrants from many parts of Asia and Europe. The British came to lay claim and made it a colony for a number of years. Due to the multi-ethnic make-up of the population, people spoke their own language of home, plus a smattering of whatever other languages that their friends and neighbours spoke. Communication between races and ethnic groups was made up of a mixture of each one's different language. Did it matter that grammar rules were thrown out the window? Certainly not. Communication was effective and efficient. Everyone got along quite well with each other.

After China chose to unite the entire country and ethnic groups in one national language, Mandarin, Singapore chose to follow suit. Being that the older generation spoke either fluent English, or whatever Chinese dialect they grew up speaking, or both, the big push to get all Chinese Singaporeans speaking Mandarin was quite a task. Yet, look at us today!

Singaporean leaders have a working proficiency of Mandarin and a firm grasp of English. While we may not be able to conduct a government-level negotiation in Mandarin, we can converse socially in the language, thus warming us to the Chinese hosts.

Language is more than just a communication tool. Learning a language means learning about a culture and a people. Speaking the language of your host touches his heart and opens doors that you never thought possible.

Want to touch a heart? Go learn his language.

Here's to multi-lingualism!

English language - thank you, Britain!

As much as I enjoy learning languages and communicating with people all over the world, I have to say that this article makes a very important point: English is the universal language of communication.

Having worked with people from all over the world mostly in South-East Asia, I have found that the only way we can all communicate with each other is in English. I may speak one or more of the languages of the people I deal with, but they cannot communicate with the others in their language because the others do not speak it. English becomes the medium of effective communication among us.

Dealing with varying levels of proficiency in English has also forced me to write simply, so that the message comes across quickly and clearly. Two Malaysian friends found my writing to be hilarious because I had spelled out everything in minute detail, but after explaining that most of the readers have low levels of English and the fact that most of them do not know how to follow instructions, my "writing-for-small-children" style was imperative to the smooth running of the event.

Whether you like it or not, English is here to stay. Write simply.

An interesting point the article brought out was that anywhere that England conquered in the past and became a British colony, that place still uses English as the main language of business and everyday life. British colonialism has left an indelible mark on many parts of the world.

That set me thinking about Japan in history. The Japanese conquered and ruled much of Asia during World War II. While some of those 80 years and older may still speak some Japanese, this language is not prevalent outside of Japan. Colonialism may not always leave a positive legacy in the colonised nation. It all depends on what kind of positive influences the colonial masters left behind. At the end of the day, personal relationships and human kindness always prevail.

What kind of impact are you leaving on those around you? May it be positive!

Here's to leaving a lasting legacy where you are!

Don't use bombastic words

Do you use big words in your writing? There was a time in my childhood that "bombastic" was an often-quoted word to describe people who constantly used "big" words to impress others with their so-called command of the English language. Most of the time, the speaker of flowery language had only a vague idea of what he was saying. He had just learned a new word and wanted to show off to his friends how intelligent he was.

Was he really intelligent? Maybe. Unfortunately, the primary purpose of language is communication. Communication is only effective when the listener has fully understood what the speaker/writer is trying to say. Bombastic words fulfill no purpose except to show that the writer is good at his craft. What is he trying to say? I do not really know. Precisely the point of this article. Big words do not always convey the message. It is time to simplify.
A rule of thumb that I was taught in writing a brief message to another person is: write as though a third-grader is going to read your message. If he understands what you said, you have communicated well. Of course, that all depends on the content of your message. Not all communication is meant for third-graders. The point is we have to write simply. There is no place for showing off in daily communication. Be clear of what you want to say, and write it clearly.

The world will be a less confusing place if we all decided to simplify our writing styles.

Here's to clear and concise writing!

Read the fine print?

Just over a year ago, the Singapore government started a campaign to get government agencies to write simply. Since then, some commercial companies have followed suit by rewriting their terms and conditions to allow the average person to understand what he is getting himself into.

Too often we look at a thick legal document and put it aside before even reading the first line. Technical jargon, legal speak, do not understand, ... Who bothers to read the Terms and Conditions, or "fine print" for that matter? The sales person explained everything to me already.

Since the move to simplify legal documents, the number of pages has also been drastically reduced, by up to 50%! How about that for saving the environment by using less paper? I think many people actually bother to read the Terms and Conditions now.

It is certainly timely. We could all benefit from less confusion and more direct writing styles. The earth would benefit from the reduction in paper usage. Win-win situation all round!

Here's to clear and simple written communication!

Eat potatoes or sweet potatoes?

In the Singapore context, when a Chinese person wants to make a point that he cannot speak Chinese, he will say in Hokkien (or the Fujian dialect) that he is "jiak kantang" or "eat potato". The interesting thing about this phrase is that "jiak" means "eat" in Hokkien, but "kantang" is a borrowed word from Malay (correct spelling in Malay is "kentang") meaning "potato". Uniquely Singaporean expression.

Since Asians eat mostly rice and westerners eat mostly potatoes, I suppose that is how this phrase came about. If you eat potatoes, then you must be western-trained and therefore speak English.

Chinese people do eat potatoes, but most prefer sweet potatoes instead. If you are Chinese in Singapore and can speak Chinese, you would not refer to yourself as being a sweet potato eater. For that matter, there is no equivalent expression for those who are proficient in Chinese. A derogatory term for those who are educated in Chinese but speak little English is "Chinese helicopter", meaning that he speaks English haltingly or with a stutter (the sound of which is like the whirring blades of a helicopter).

An evangelist friend from a Chinese-speaking church commented that there is a dearth of local Chinese-speaking pastors and evangelists. In fact, many of the pastors here were once English-educated and have crossed the language divide due to a need. This made him call us "Jiak kantang cho huan zi kang" (吃马铃薯，作番薯工）or "eat potatoes but do sweet potato work". This is not ideal because communication is more than just being able to speak the language. Communication involves understanding the other culture, nuances and expressions. Just because I speak basic Chinese does not mean I understand the Chinese person's psyche. For someone like me who grew up "eating potatoes", this is definitely true. However, being a lifelong student always opens the door to another's heart. Sincerity will always win the day.

Regardless of what kind of staple food you eat, let's be open to another culture and language. Our lives will be so much richer for the education.

Here's to celebrating diversity!

Egg, Banana or Coconut?

If you are familiar with Asian American terminology, you would know what being called a "banana" means. The banana fruit is yellow on the outside and white on the inside. If an Asian person is called a "banana" (or as one of my China friends put it 香蕉人 - "banana person"), it means that he has yellow skin (or looks completely Asian on the outside) but his language, thinking and behaviour is completely western (or "white").

Eggs, on the other hand, have white shells (at least duck eggs and some chicken eggs do!) and contain a yellow yolk in the centre. My white American friend who lives in Hawaii calls himself an "egg". He has a Japanese-American wife. He is the opposite of the "banana". He may be a white American on the outside, but his thinking and value system is completely Asian.

My Samoan friend is brown-skinned. He grew up speaking Samoan, but he spent a large part of his life in the mainland USA. His thinking and behaviour is completely western. One day, when a few of us were describing ourselves as "bananas" or "eggs", he walked by and said, "Just call me a 'coconut'." We all promptly burst out laughing.

I have always considered myself a "banana". I was born into an English-speaking home environment. Nobody spoke Mandarin. Three of my four grandparents spoke English. The other grandparent was unschooled. She only spoke Cantonese. Since I was despised from birth since I am female, she hardly spoke to me. I attended an English-speaking Catholic school. All of us scraped through Chinese lessons, doing much better at English.

In my adult working years, I was thrown into a Chinese-speaking environment. I was forced to speak, and later on try to read the newspapers daily as part of my job. Many years later, I decided to start all over again, reading my Bible daily with a dictionary by my side. I am still not fluent, neither can I read well, but I manage. The greatest compliment I received sometime ago was from a friend from China. He said, "妳已经不是香蕉人了！“ ("You are no longer a banana!") He went on to tell me how much he enjoyed my sermons in Chinese because he received insights that he did not get from sermons in English. I was moved to tears.

I still consider myself a "banana" today. Will that ever change? I don't know. Suffice it to say that the colour of my skin does not define who I am. Neither should you be defined as such. Just be yourself!

Here's to individuality and diversity!

I "copas", so it must be right

If you are Indonesian, you will probably know what "copas" means. It is not at all an Indonesian word. In fact, it is more likely to be labelled as Bahasa Jakarta or "Jakarta language". Jakarta language is not a proper language. There are many words that are acronyms of a phrase that takes too long to sound out. Hence, the truncation.

"Copas" is one such truncation. "CO(py) (and) PAS(te) = Copas" Get it? Quite clever, I must say.

Actually, the point of this blog post is not about truncation or Jakarta language. It is about "copy and paste" of texts that we want to quote in our writing. Since someone else has already typed it out, why should I waste my time and type it out again? Just copy and paste. It will be accurate that way. No typo errors.

You sure about that?

My friend posted a video on one of the SNS sites, quoting on the side the lyrics of the song being sung. Since I do enjoy that group's music and was curious about the rendition of the song, I clicked on the video to watch it, while keeping an eye on the lyrics at the side. Beautiful rendition of the song. I love acapella singing. It is a real test of pitch and hearing.

Since the song was only one stanza, I thought my friend had transcribed the lyrics after listening to the song. I spotted something strange in one of the lines:

He it is who binds us together
And He it is who sends us apart
To be God's people, be God's people

If God binds us together, why would He "send us apart"? Should it not read "And He it is who 'sets' us apart"?

So, me being this nitpicky proofreader of anything and everything written or printed (besides being somewhat too much of a busybody most times), I decided to make the comment in the paragraph above. I did add that since this was the choral group's final performance, "sends us apart" would also be appropriate.

The return jab was (paraphrased to be grammatically correct): "All I did was copy and paste the lyrics from a song lyric site!"

I decided not to fire another salvo. Friendship should never be sacrificed over a sentence.

Depending on the context of a typo, we can either choose to press our point or let it go. Before you decide what to do, take a step back and look at the big picture. Good relations should always take precedence over accuracy.

Here's to lasting friendship and accuracy in writing!

Men vs Women and Toddlers

A male friend of mine was introduced to his friend's son, a toddler, probably no older than three years old. The little boy was being carried in his father's arms, but he seemed to want to run around because he kept fidgeting non-stop.

Trying to be friendly, my friend said to the little boy, "High five. High five." He said this while using his hand to try and get the little boy to return the gesture. It did not work. The boy was more interested in trying to get his father to put him down and let him run around. The father finally did. The two men then carried on their conversation.

I have seen men of every age, shape, size and nationality do the same thing when they meet a child, whether boy or girl, of any age. Some do it gently, others (more likely my big American friends) go, "Hey, buddy, give me a five!" Often, the little boy or girl will respond enthusiastically with a high five and a giggle or two.

As I watched my friend trying so hard to engage the little boy, I started thinking about how women react to toddlers. We do not go "high five". Instead, we may come up with a phrase like the following, or a combination of two or more phrases:

"Oh, you're so cute!"
"What's your name, Honey/Sweetheart?"
"How old are you, Sweetie?" "You are just the cutest little boy/girl!"

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus? Yes, indeed. Our reactions to the same situation are vastly different, as though we are from two different planets. But then, who would want men and women to react in exactly the same way? The world would be so boring!

Let's celebrate our differences as men and women! The world is a happier place because of our differences!

"Pecking" Duck or "Peeking" Duck?

I was at a wedding dinner last week. Before we were allowed into the ballroom for dinner, we were served cocktails, which are usually just a variety of cold drinks and light alcohol. I was therefore pleasantly surprised when a waiter bearing a heavy tray of little rolls came up to me and asked if I would like something to eat. Normally, I would decline, but he said, "It's Peking Duck." Since this is not your usual hors d'oeuvre, I decided to try a piece. Delicious! I stopped at one piece or that would have been my dinner instead of the eight-course meal to follow. That little snack got me thinking. I have always heard this dish pronounced as "Peeking" Duck. The waiter pronounced it as such. However, I have heard westerners say "Pecking" Duck. Hmmm ... so which one is correct? According to this site, "Peeking" is the correct pronunciation. I thought so. Of course, when referring to the capital of China, "Peking" is no longer used. We call it Beijing (北京). I suppose the old name smacks of western colonialism. I much prefer the new name. Let's call a city the way the locals do. But as for the duck dish, it will probably remain as Peking Duck for a long time to come. Bon Apetit! Note: If you are in Beijing and want to savour authentic Peking Duck, you will have to order it by its Chinese name: Beijing ya (北京鸭).